acatalepsy_rpg | video | dated at the very end of week one

[The video opens on a patch of dirt, a leg stretched out along one edge of the screen. Next to the leg a number of very small muddy spots map out a connect-the-dots picture that more creative minds - or just anyone who's ever been a bored teenager - might recognize as a sort-of accurate depiction of one particular x-rated body part. A voice, cracking and hoarse like it has to drag itself over gravel to get its words out, starts speaking immediately.]

Hey, you know what makes me-

[His coughing is harsh and wet but it's only a few seconds before it stops. Hank mutters a curse under his breath, just audible, and hacks up a loogie, spitting it so it lands just so off the end of the art in the dirt next to him. The dirt there goes wet and dark, and with this artistic rendering of a drop of splooge, his masterpiece is complete. When he leans back the camera's in a different position; in the opposite corner from the dirt the screen shows the massive head of a Saint Bernard, taking up a good part of the screen and the majority of Hank's lap.]

You know what makes me feel better when I'm feeling like shit? Bitching about it. Let's bitch, guys. Tell me how shitty you've got it right now. It's not like anyone's got anything else to do here, right? I mean, not unless someone can get this big furry boulder to unglue itself from my lap. I'd have something to do if he'd just play. Look, watch this, it's pathetic.

Hey, Sumo. Fetch.

[Anyone with motion sickness might want to look away; the screen jerks around wildly as the arm with the camera on it moves to grab a rock and hold it in the air like Hank's going to throw it. Then the screen goes still again as Hank has to lean forward to cough, his dog's big, placid face now taking up the whole view. Sumo gives a single low whuff, lifts his head, and apparently settles himself right over the camera because the screen goes dark. There's the muffled sound of Hank cursing, trying to say Sumo's name between coughs, and then nothing as Hank manages to work his other hand under Sumo's jaw and shut the recording off.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ It doesn't take much to notice the awkward air brewing; 9S, in turn, feels a touch guilty for bringing it to this point, but what else was he going to do? He can't just let people keep calling him a damn machine, even if it was coming from a human. Ugh. ]

... Right. Well—anyway... Where were we?

[ Let's just steer it away from that, for now. ]

[The other guy trying to move past the whole thing helps; Hank's awkward look mostly drains away.]

I don't even remember. Robo-evolution, I think? But I kind of get the feeling there's not much to say about that outside 'it's been such a long-ass time that no one actually knows how anything happened'. No android archaeologists where you're from, huh?

[ Alright, good. Moving on then. ]

Actually, there were a lot of them around—it wasn't odd to find someone with a special interest in finding old relics of the past. We'd been able to find a lot about how humans used to be that way, at least.

That’s so weird, rob- uh, androids studying us like we studied, I don’t know, cavemen.

[He shrugs, spreading his arms.]

Well, if you ever have any questions for an extinct species, I’m around. I can tell you all about all the stupid shit we got up to.

Really? You would?

[ 9S brightens up suddenly, like an eager kid. ]

—I mean, when you've gotten better, of course. You probably need to rest more first.

[Hank raises his eyebrows, sounding a little surprised at the enthusiasm.]

Believe me, I've got all the rest I can stand; answering survey questions about life in the early-ish two thousands is at least something to do. But yeah, any time. Don't know if I can help you with the bigger picture - I kinda stopped paying attention to current events a few decades back - but yeah, why not? Even if our uh, dimensions turn out to be different, I might be able to clear some stuff up. Gaps in your archaeological whatever.

Huh. I seem to run into a lot of humans who come from the 21st century... [ Peculiar! ] And yet, you're the first one I've met who has androids as something commonplace where you're from.

Oh yeah, they've been around a while. [He shrugs, grimacing and holding the comment on the tip of his tongue about how lucky all those other people are because saying shit like that right to this guy's face is starting to feel weird.] Is that what you're curious about? Don't know why I got it when all those other people didn't, but uh, the way androids transmit information or whatever, it's supposed to be some huge scientific breakthrough. It was a huge deal when that guy first invented it. Maybe something about multi-dimensional whatever means mine just got the right inventor in the right place at the right time, that kind of thing.

Hm—you have a fair point. I never knew about the concept of alternate realities back on Earth, so seeing it at work is... bizarre, but pretty interesting. Even one person can make all the difference.

I don't know, most of the 'differences' I've seen so far are, 'hey, what if magic was real!' which, uh. Not really doing much to pique my interest. Maybe I should of studied quantum physics a little more but it all still sounds like bullshit to me. Unless you've met people I haven't, but personally I haven't met one person who's like 'hey what if we lost this war instead', it's all impossible shit.

I guess it's just me, then. From my perspective, everything I hear from you guys sounds—well, not impossible, but more like they're just stories, y'know? Maybe it was real once, but it's so far removed from the world I lived in.

Yeah? [He thinks about that for a second.] Then how do you take any of it seriously? Everything I hear just makes me feel like all this is one really long dream.

[Hank sounds unsettled, when he says that. It's not a great feeling, not being able to make sense of anything, and it gets less great the longer it goes on.]

Hmm...

[ 9S curls his free hand underneath his chin, having to reflect on the question for a moment. ]

I dunno, it's not like I can really say what is and isn't possible for other humans. Besides, what's so bad about it?

[ He doesn't miss the discomfort in your voice there, Hank. ]

It's like- [He tries to explain, grimaces, and shakes his head.] It doesn't make any sense. That doesn't bother you? I know what is and isn't possible for humans and let me tell you, this isn't it. Magic and witches and whole worlds that need saving, that's- That's not something that happens! That's a movie! That's not life!

[He looks away, taking a breath and calming himself down a little, looking maybe a little embarrassed, looking definitely a little displeased.]

This being a dream's the only thing that makes sense, but- That doesn't make sense. Does it?

[He tilts his head back, his voice a little muffled because of the way he's holding his hands over his face.]

I don't know. Fuck. Maybe androids are better suited to this shit than I am. You're more... adaptive, no preconceived whatevers. Human brain's not, uh, flexible enough. I just need this to make sense.

[ ... Oof. This guy isn't taking all this too well, is he? 9S' mouth twists a little. ]

I don't know if it has anything to do with me being an android. [ Even if he was built with a more adaptive mindset, but it wasn't as if he were the same as most other androids he knew. ] It was all pretty weird for me at first, too.

[He scrubs his hands over his face, takes yet another deep breath, then risks taking his hands off his face and facing the world - this weird, bullshit world full of weird and bullshit - to look doubtfully at the screen.]

Yeah? Seems kind of hard to believe, but how'd you end up dealing with it? Don't tell me you just... chilled out.

['Time heals all wounds' has no right to be applicable here. 'Time heals all the freaky shit' doesn't roll off the tongue nearly as well.]

Heh. For starters, I suppose it helped that I didn't have a load of free time like we do now to stop and think about it. When you're busy fighting for your life, you don't get as caught up in what doesn't make sense, y'know?

Shit, yeah, this free time's a killer. Knowing my luck I'd probably try to do both at once and get killed or some stupid shit, so maybe this is for the best. So it was just easier after, once the uh, first round of bullshit was done?

[Please ignore how hopeful Hank sounds, here. Hank's ignoring it. If he ignores it he won't mind as much when it turns out to be a lot harder for his crusty old ass to get over this shit than it was for the robot.]

video | dated at the very end of week one

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject